I dropped Carly off at doggy daycare and instantly felt horrible. I felt that I was the WORST dog mom out there. Because I lost my job, I couldn't decide if paying someone to watch my dog was worth it. I thought I could take care of my dog myself!
I quickly started to descend down the guilt slide. To prevent myself from slipping further down, I reminded myself why I sent her there.
I need a break to have a day to myself (first time in weeks!!!)
I don't want her to suffer from me being busy applying to jobs all-day.
She can play all day with other dogs while I can get a lot done
Since I don't have health insurance, I haven't been able to get my ADHD medication this month. It's been difficult to focus, but with her gone I can finally still sit down and hyperfocus for a bit.
When I start working full-time, I want her to have a place she likes and feels safe going to a few times each week.
A bad dog mom wouldn't care this much about their dog's happiness. A bad dog mom is one who doesn't take care of herself. A bad dog mom is not well rested. A bad dog mom is one who never asks for help when she needs it, even if it feels like something she could do on her own.
A good dog mom loves her dog so much that she cries when she drops her puppy off at daycare for the first time. A good dog mom rests when she needs to recharge. A good dog mom wants the best life for her puppy. A good dog mom misses her puppy even when she knows puppy daycare is best for both of us. I am a good dog mom, so why I am I feeling guilty for dropping my dog off to play all day with other dogs?
Guilt can consume us easily, as it is a mighty powerful emotion. I struggle to navigate it a lot, myself. What helps me a ton is doing the above activity with what I feel guilty about.
I start by asking myself: what is it that I feel guilty about?
What were the reasons why I made that decision?
Re-read those reasons as many times as you need to.
Then break them down and ask yourself, would a "good person" make the same choice based on those reasons? ( if you DO say no, maybe rethink your intentions but my guess is that you would say yes to these! ◡̈ )
Our brains looooooooove proof! So while it may seem silly, proving to your brain that you don't need to carry this guilt can a helpful way to navigate it. Especially when you out here trying your damn best! And to quote my favorite Taylor Swift song, "This is me trying, at least I'm trying." You & I both are trying and that is enough, no need to add guilt to the mix.
PS. I dropped Carly off today & she ran right into the owners arms ready to play. Seeing Carly that happy and to know she is safe, having fun, and getting lots of play time in makes the guilt melt away too.
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