I have been focusing a lot of my energy lately on my body and accepting it as it is. It has been quite interesting because whenever I have attempted to do intuitive eating & movement in the past I have found myself falling into the trap of self-judgment. This time around, I was given the advice to be curious vs judgmental. Easier said than done BUT any time I have had a thought (usually a judgmental one) over the past few weeks about my body, something I am going to eat or wear I think - why am I thinking this?
Here are some things I have learned about myself from being curious - I wear SO much black. SO. MUCH. BLACK. I wear black because I was told it’s “flattering” which really means it makes me look smaller than I am. Taking up less space is something young women are raised to do and I am so sick of that message. I am not going to get rid of all my black clothes - I actually like a lot of them but, moving forward I will be trying to incorporate more color into my outfits.
Color is fun and I have always thought of myself as a "fun" person so why not let my clothes express that side of me as well! I recently bought a bright red bikini and pink cropped top tank so we are making some progress already! I took this pic, this past weekend as I was embracing this new "fun" energy at the beach with Harry Styles' new album wearing bright red @ the beach and I realized that this is the energy I want to radiate! 😁
My second realization was about my favorite beverage, JUICE!!! Growing up we never had juice in the house so now as an adult, I love buying it for myself! When I did Weight Watchers one summer in college, they had this saying they would say at almost every meeting, “it’s a waste of points to drink your calories…” then people would share drinks they like and the instructor would let everybody know how many points it was. A margarita was almost 20 points and I think I got like 23 or 25 for the full day so it was either one margarita and a day filled with zero point foods or no margaritas. I loved margaritas, especially in the summer, so it was usually a day of zero-point foods if I ever had one. I no longer live this way and this past weekend I had a margarita and while I heard the voice, “don’t drink your calories” I was able to hear it and then silence it quickly after.
Now let’s get back to juice… by being curious about my thoughts when I drink juice I realized I LOVE fun juices WAY more than alcohol. I’d rather have a fat glass of Strawberry Apple Juice (a new fave of mine) than a glass of wine at the end of the day. I realized that my very small relationship with alcohol (I drink maybe 2x a month) isn’t as enjoyable as my juice relationship. Juice never gives me a headache, tastes amazing every time, and makes my brain feel good vs groggy/foggy in the way alcohol makes me feel.
I’m not giving up alcohol, in the same way, I am not giving up black clothes but it has crossed my mind especially since I started to take antidepressant medication which makes 1 drink feel like 4.
I could go on and on with all the self-realizations I have discovered in the past two weeks by being curious versus judgmental but, I’ll save you the time.
What I will do is leave you with this challenge - be curious about yourself this week/weekend and release any judgmental thoughts that arise.
Once you know who you really are it makes showing up authentically that much easier!
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