When I was in college I was co-president of my college’s Active Minds chapter on campus. For those who don’t know, Active Minds is an organization whose mission is to eliminate the stigma around mental health on college campuses.
I always supported the mission but deep down the stigma that I was fighting against had quite a grip on me. I was strongly advocating for the mental health of others and wasn’t considering my own. *cue being a people pleaser*
I only started going to therapy last May & working with a coach this past summer, but have been struggling with anxiety and depression for much longer than that! I can recall having panic attacks as early as 7th grade when I thought a C- in French was going to make or break my whole future. The stigma around getting help prevented me from getting help.
I had always carried this fear that if one of my teammates, classmates, or professors saw me going into the health services building on campus regularly they would think less of me. If my mental struggle was known about, I thought that my teammates would think I was an inefficient captain, my professors would think less of me as a student, and my friends would dislike me because I wasn't this "perfect friend" I was attempting to project out into the world. All of my fears were about how my mental health struggles would be perceived by others vs how I actually felt…say hello once again to my pal, people pleaser!
I didn’t get help in college and that is something I regret because guess what...my issues continued and for some of them, they got even worse.
This is your sign if you have been considering getting help - please do it.
Since starting coaching & therapy, I have been able to learn how to put myself first despite how challenging it is. I realized that I can’t control how others feel about me and at the end of the day that’s not a me issue, that’s on them. For example, if someone on my team in college was upset and thought I was a bad captain for needing mental health services, that’s on them not me. Boy, do I wish I knew that back then! ☺️
I obviously can’t go back in time and change the ways things played out BUT what I can do is continue to advocate for mental health & share my story because the stigma is strong... as an advocate, I have even been impacted by it.
This month, I will be sharing more of my mental health stories on this blog & LinkedIn because the stigma still exists today and I know how strong it can be but I also know how liberating it can be once you do get the help!
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